GENEALOGY MAKES YOU LAUGH. (And Cry)

        "Some family trees have beautiful leaves,
        but some just have a bunch of nuts.
        Remember it is the nuts that make the tree worth shaking."

        Dear Ancestor

        Your tombstone stands among the rest;
        Neglected and alone.
        The name and date are chiseled out
        On polished, marbled stone.
        It reaches out to all who care
        It is too late to mourn.
        You did not know that I exist
        You died and I was born.
        Yet each of us are cells of you
        In flesh, in blood, in bone.
        Our blood contracts and beats a pulse
        Entirely not our own.
        Dear Ancestor, the place you filled
        One hundred years ago
        Spreads out among the ones you left
        Who would have loved you so.
        I wonder if you lived and loved,
        I wonder if you knew
        That someday I would find this spot,
        And come to visit you.

        Grandma's Disease… and more poems

        Top 10 Indicators That You've Become A Gene-Aholic

        • You introduce your daughter as your descendent.
        • You've never met any of the people you send e-mail to, even though you're related.
        • You can recite your lineage back eight generations, but can't remember your nephew's name.
        • You have more photographs of dead people than living ones.
        • You've ever taken a tape recorder and/or notebook to a family reunion.
        • You've not only read the latest GEDCOM standard, but also you understand it.
        • The local genealogy society borrows books from you.
        • The only film you've seen in the last year was the 1851 census index.
        • More than half of your CD collection is made up of marriage records or pedigrees.
        • Your elusive ancestor has been spotted in more different places than Elvis!

          You know you're taking genealogy too seriously if...

          You are the only person to show up at the cemetery research party with a shovel.

          To put the "final touches" on your genealogical research, you've asked all of your closest relatives to provide DNA samples.

          Your house leans slightly toward the side where your genealogical records are stored.

          You decided to take a two-week break from genealogy, and the Postal Office immediately laid off 1,500 employees.

          Out of respect for your best friend's unquestioned reputation for honesty and integrity, you are willing to turn off that noisy surveillance camera while she reviews your 57 genealogical research notebooks in your home. The armed security guard, however, will remain.

          During a winter storm and power outage, you ignore the pleas of your shivering spouse and place your last quilt around that 1886 photograph of dear Uncle George.

          Your wallpaper is coming unstuck and there is so little paint on the woodwork that you could varish it

          "A Loving Family" and "Financial Security" have moved up to second and third, respectively, on your list of life's goals, but still lag far behind "Owning My Own Microfilm Reader."

          The grass is so long that you can no longer find the garden furniture

          A magical genie appears and agrees to grant your any one wish, and you ask that the 1911 census be released early.



          Graphics By Shawna